You Don't Love Me!

Has your child ever said this to you? We're going through this phase for the second time of our parenthood...different child, same age range. It shocked me the first time. I'll be honest...it hurts. It hurts to think my daughter doesn't think I love her no matter what the reason.

So what prompted this break-my-heart statement? I punished her.

My girls are not perfect...I know this comes as a huge surprise to everyone, right? Before I had kids I thought discipline would be a simple matter. I imagined it going something like this:

1. Child disobeys direct instruction.

2. Child is corrected and punished.

3. Child never disobeys again.

4. Happily ever after.

...and now every mother is laughing, right? Every parent of a child over the age of two knows reality is usually much, much different. 

1. Child disobeys direct instruction.

2. Child is corrected and punished.

3. Child disobeys same direct instruction.

4. Child is corrected and punished. 

and on...

and on...

it goes

This is why my daughter cried and said, "You don't love me!" It wounded my heart this second time around just like the first, but at least I had been through it before and therefore know there is another side. As much as she probably really felt that way at the moment she said it, she knows deep down we do love her deeply, unconditionally. We tell her all the time, especially when we have to enforce a rule.

Feelings and truth are constantly at war in my own heart. I know God is good. I believe He is sovereign. I understand His will is not my own. I trust He loves me. 

BUT...

I so often don't feel those truths. Life hurts. Tears fall. My heart wavers. Although I may never voice the feeling, it often lurks beneath the surface.

These moments are the very reason I spend time with God regularly, why I faithfully study His Word alone and with others on Sunday morning. When I'm at my lowest I cannot rely on my emotions. I can only rest on His promises.

He will never leave me nor forsake me. (Deuteronomy 31:6)

He has a plan and purpose for every trail I face. (Jeremiah 29:11; Romans 8:28-30)

He is on my side. (Romans 8:31)

He loves me. (John 3:16)

The first song all three of my girls learned to sing was Jesus Loves Me. My sweet husband sang it to each of them within an hour of their births as he held them for the very first time. Read these words once again. Absorb them into your heart. Capture them in your memory. When your feelings don't match up with truth, allow God to remind you of the truth so He can change your feelings. 

Jesus loves me! This I know,

For the Bible tells me so.

Little ones to Him belong;

They are weak but He is strong.

Jesus loves me! Loves me still,

'Tho I'm very weak and ill,

That I might from sin be free,

Bled and died upon the tree.

Jesus loves me! He who died

Heaven's gate to open wide;

He will wash away my sin,

Let His little child come in.

Jesus loves me! He will stay

Close beside me all the way.

Thou hast bled and died for me,

I will henceforth live for Thee.

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

The Bible tells me so.